The first two weeks are over, and I have only needed to repeat my mantra (I can do hard things) four or five times. This was a fortnight full of parent e-mails, lunch pin memorization, a mad and frustrating rush to get to daycare before it closes, simple dinners, afternoon walks, learning to do errands in the evening to save weekends for fun, a fabulous visit with my mom and sister, lesson planning, falling asleep on the couch, a new family division of labor, and the solidification of our new routine.
I love my class and my first grade team. We work well together and have a beautiful plan for the year that is going to guide our planning and make things fun and interesting. My kids are funny and sweet. Milo has settled into daycare and loves his provider very much. So much that when we saw her outside of her house last night, he lunged out of my arms to be held by her. It hurt my pride a little, but I am constantly reminding myself that he has a lot of adjusting to do, and I am so lucky that he is happy and safe all day while I’m working hard. Obviously, though, I took a little ego-beating.
Ben has really stepped up, doing tons of chores whenever he’s not at work and doing the arguably harder drop-off at daycare. My friends have helped me get to daycare on time(ish) in the afternoon, even thought Milo is typically the last kid and the buses aren’t running smoothly enough yet for me to get there a second earlier. I had to turn a parent away who turned up asking to talk to me because I had to leave, and they rescheduled for Monday morning at 8; this leaves me wondering all weekend. I think all the time of mother’s guilt, accept it as a part of my adult life from here on out, and try (with less difficulty that ever before) to move on and enjoy my two days at home.
On the upside, Ben and I are really enjoying our new life as working parents. It’s important to get to feel fulfilled in lots of different ways, and I think we are. We work together in the morning and have breakfast as a family meal. We split up chores and errands and give each other breaks. We take turns picking what we’ll watch at night, and have both planned little outings and mini vacations with friends coming up in the fall. This morning, Ben was packing his lunch and I was feeding Milo, and we were moving through the kitchen and helping each other out, talking bills and plans and upcoming dates. Ben just stopped and said, “I love you at 26.” Poor guy has been dealing with my rollercoaster of emotion since the month I turned 19…I’m glad we’re both happier as I get older, wiser, and probably a good deal calmer.
Today Laurel is coming to watch Milo while I get a pedicure, and then later while Ben and I have a little date night. In between we have BBQs, brunches, and some phone-and-internet-free play time. I hope your fall is just as full and you’re giving yourself lots of things to look forward to. Here’s to enjoying this season of our lives.